Wittgenstein's Grave

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Inspired by Hazel's trip to Glossop with some students to celebrate Wittgensteins' kite flying trips. She takes some 1st years every Spring to make kites and fly them on the Moors. They go to the pub for lunch where Wittengenstein used to drink and do poetry readings and performance much to the alarm of the natives.

The Doctor's receptionist

.There's nothing worse than a doctor's receptionist who insists you tell her what is wrong with you in a room full of other patients. I know most of us have experienced this, and I love the way this old guy handled it:

A 65-year-old man walked into a crowded waiting room and approached the desk.

The receptionist said, "Yes, sir, what are you seeing the doctor for today?"

He replied, "There's something wrong with my d!ck."

The receptionist became irritated and said, "You shouldn't come into a crowded waiting room and say things like that."

"Why not? You asked me what was wrong, and I told you."

The receptionist replied, "Now you' ve caused some embarrassment in this room full of people. You should have said there is something wrong with your ear and then discussed the problem further with the doctor in private."

"You shouldn't ask people questions in a room full of strangers if the answer could embarrass anyone," the man said. ! Then he walked out and waited several minutes before re-entering.

The receptionist smiled smugly and said, "Yes?"

"There's something wrong with my ear."

The receptionist nodded approvingly and smiled, knowing he had taken her advice. "And what is wrong with your ear, sir?"

"I can't pi$$ out of it."

The waiting room erupted in laughter.

The lesson: Mess with seniors, and you're going to lose
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aNOtHEr dIp INtO ThE mAGpIE mEMOrY pOOoL.

A Feast of Posters

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What would the neighbours think?

'It's just too hot to wear clothes today,' Jack said to his wife, as he stepped out of the shower, 'honey, what do you think the neighbors would think if I mowed the lawn like this?'
'Probably that I married you for your money,' she replied.


aNOtHEr dIp INtO ThE mAGpIE mEMOrY pOOoL.

Jimmy James

Another great old English comedian from the days of music hall and variety. Doing his famous "What Have You Got In That Box" routine. I have vague memories of it on TV in the 60's when Roy Castle was the barmy chap with the box.

Wikipedia says-

"Jimmy James was born James Casey on 20 May 1892 the eldest of four sons of Jeremiah Casey an iron puddler or steelmaker and Polly Gartland.[1] Many sources state he was born in Portrack, Stockton-on-Tees although other sources consider that he was born in South Bank, Middlesbrough and moved to Stockton-on-Tees at the age of seven in 1899. At the age of ten he won a boy soprano contest at the Stockton Hippodrome and shortly afterwards ran away, hitching a ride to Darlington to join a travelling show.The police located him a few years later at the age of twelve by which time he had become a seasoned performer. His father, an amateur clog dancer himself, encouraged his son's showbusiness talents.

At the Sunderland Empire Jimmy met Isabelle Darby a music hall dancer. Although Jimmy appeared on stage as a convincing drunk, often with a cigar or cigarette in his mouth, he was teetotal and did not smoke off stage. His weaknesses were gambling and his famed generosity which may account for his declared bankruptcies in 1936, 1955 and 1963. Jimmy was last on stage in 1964, retiring that year. He died in Blackpool of pulmonary congestion on 4 August 1965 following a heart attack and is buried in Oxbridge Cemetery, Stockton-on-Tees."

Rules is rules!

Rules is Rules! ... HSE eat your ass out.....


Good news: It was normal day in Sharon Springs , KS, when a Union Pacific crew boarded a loaded coal train for the long trek to Salina .

The Bad news: Just a few miles into the trip a wheel bearing became overheated and melted, letting a metal support drop down and grind on the rail, creating white hot molten metal droppings spewing down to the rail.

The Good news: A very alert crew noticed smoke about halfway back in the train and immediately stopped the train in compliance with the rules.

The Bad news: The train stopped with the hot wheel over a wooden bridge with creosote ties and trusses.

The crew tried to explain to higher-ups but were instructed not to move the train!



They were instructed The Rules prohibit moving the train when a part is defective!








RULES IS RULES!



(Don't let common sense get in the way of a good disaster!)

*I am since advised by a reliable source that " The bridge will not be built of wooden bridge timbers this time around. It will be constructed of steel girders and cement and the span will be shortened considerably."

So it ends in mid-air this time round? BUT AT LEAST IT'S FIREPROOF!

Thanks Doc!








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A Feast of Posters

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aNOtHEr dIp INtO ThE mAGpIE mEMOrY pOOoL.

John Inman

Back to the serious stuff now and your token gay for today - John Inman - him off "Are You Being Served" and a song from an LP found at a boot sale or somewhere.

"Tandem Song" from "John Inman - With A Bit Of Brass" . Found vinyl on the Webb Ivory label 1978. Here John Inman is accompanied by the Webb Ivory Newall Band and the West Midlands Police Male Voice Choir. So there.

Ask Jinksy About This!

"Overtone" singing!   It's just . . . . it's just

MIND BLOWING!

Jinksy has met this artist, Christian Bollmann, and heard his astonishing talent. The "high notes" are produced by resonances in the mouth cavity. Only the continuous bass note is "sung", in the conventinal sense, in the voice box. Jinks is hiding a lotta lights under her bushel, so she is!

Many other examples on YouTube, along with Mongolian throat singing. You'll need Jinksy to explain the differences. Christian Bollmann struck me as far and away the best of the YouTube selection of "overtone" singers.

Poetry by Inches, Words by a Mile - Philip Larkin

They fuck you up, your mum and dad.
They may not mean to, but they do.
They fill you with the faults they had
And add some extra, just for you.

But they were fucked up in their turn
By fools in old-style hats and coats,
Who half the time were soppy-stern
And half at one another's throats.

Man hands on misery to man.
It deepens like a coastal shelf.
Get out as early as you can,
And don't have any kids yourself.





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